Writing for Wellness

I’ve been negligent in taking my prescription medication for my well-being. For me, that medication is writing. 

Almost a year ago, I stopped writing creatively. I blamed it on busyness. In my previous post, I gave you an update about what’s been going on for me. Yes, my life has been crazy busy, but I’ve always managed to sneak in my writing. Not so for much of 2022.  

You may remember one of my earliest posts in which I revealed that I’m a trauma survivor. Escapism for survivors is an essential coping mechanism and isn’t wholly bad. Escapism in my world looks like busyness, so I hide myself in work or what I think is work to avoid feeling something else. I realized that I had been triggered in some way, so I had to explore this further. I did not want to give up writing permanently.

I “therapized” myself to discern what was triggering me. The job comes easier when you’re already a therapist and are pretty self-aware. What was triggering me exactly? Well, a year ago, I was starting my private practice and trying to market my first book Be Still & Be Bold simultaneously. I was hosting groups and a podcast and I was trying to network. I was also recovering from a pretty bad experience with a business coach. I wasn’t fully prepared for all that goes into building a business and I had to go on a steep learning curve. I didn’t know what I was doing (often still don’t). I was anxious about the money I was spending and not bringing in, so that brought up feelings of inadequacy, not enoughness and hopelessness. Add on the other responsibilities I already had and yup, I was a mess and on the fast road to burnout.

Then, without thinking, I launched into a part-time job that looked good on paper and initially was pretty cool. Enter busyness Stage Right.

I tricked myself into justifying why I had this job – to get back into nonprofit work, to pay for the startup expenses for my practice, to help pay for college etc. The reality was I was anxious and fearful about finances, and I was suffering from low esteem because I didn’t have any practice clients yet.

It took me 10 months to quit. Ten interminable months. Although I was miserable, the busyness kept me comfortable, if that makes any sense. It kept me from thinking about the future and better yet, it kept me from facing those yucky, uncomfortable things called emotions. Staying busy was always the safe bet.  

How did I get back to writing? In spurts. I eased my way back by journaling here and there. Under the guidance of a different coach and my own introspection, I asked myself tough questions and realized that this job was not going to move me toward my dreams. I have more years behind me than I do ahead of me, so time is a resource I can’t afford to waste. So, I quit.

That was a month ago. Yes, it’s been that recent. But, a lot has changed in that time. I started this blog again. I created something that will help me get to my dream (more on that in a moment). Today, I started writing my next book. I am letting go one finger at a time on the death grip I’ve had on money and my destiny and trying to let the chips fall where they may. The key word there is trying. I didn’t get here overnight so I know I have a journey ahead of me, but I’m trusting in the process that I will get there someday.  

So getting back to my hint about creation….I love groups, whether they’re support groups, therapy groups, writing groups etc. There is so much powerful healing and creative energy in groups that I can’t get enough of them. For the last few years, my dream has been to create a container in which to host groups and given my background, I would like that container to involve writing in some way.  

And so, I am beginning to host online writing groups with the hope of moving to a hybrid of in-person and virtual experiences. My first event of the year will be April 23 at 2 p.m. EDT via Zoom and it’s called “Writing for Wellness.” Over the course of 90 minutes, I will walk you through two activities, discussion and a time for freewriting as we explore the theme, “Defining Wellness.” I want to share the love I have for writing as well as the benefits of writing in general.  

If you are interested in attending, you can register at writingforwellness.eventbrite.com. Cost is $45. I plan on hosting these events on a bimonthly basis, so if you can’t attend the one in April, I will be having another session in June.

Writing has been such a lifeline for me, and it’s gotten me back on track toward my future. I can’t wait to share with you what I discover along the way.